Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Things you can do to support your loved one in need

Studies show the presence of a solid support system is a huge predictor of eating disorder recovery. In fact, research on Family-Based Therapy, where family is not only supportive, but also actively involved in a direct way with restoration of an adolescent, has been shown to be by far the strongest and most effective evidence-based treatment.

But whether you're an adolescent or adult, the presence of support from family and loved ones is likely to be one of the most important factors in recovery. We know that no one gets better alone. We know that our ability to connect helps us recover in every way.

For many people, our family and sometimes our closest friends are the people who form the basis of our support and community that will help us recover. Always remember, eating disorders are an illness. Families do not cause them, but rather they can help cure them.

If you are the support system, there are things you can do to help your loved one suffering from an eating disorder.

1. The person is not the disorder. They remain the same person, regardless of how they suffer. Loving by itself does not, however, create a cure. We must always remember that love is a necessary component, but love alone will not make someone better.

2. If we're helping someone with an eating disorder, we must get support for ourselves. In the same way we must accept that our loved one has an illness, we must accept that our lives are burdened by this illness. Support for us will make us stronger and better able to function.

3. We must be willing to be fully and actively engaged, especially if our family members are adolescents. We must know about the meal plans and treatment strategies for our family members. We must know honesty, transparency and respect are all keys to communicating with loved ones who have this illness. We must be sensitive, firm and avoid all comments about food, body and appearance.

In addition, we must be willing to distract loved ones from the pains of treatment. Our loved ones depend on us to help us create a life worth living and to start building that life at whatever stage of the eating disorder we find ourselves in.

In addition to psychological and family roles, eating disorders are a tremendous financial burden. We need to make sure people have the best possible insurance and understand their benefits. The eating disorder will affect their lives and ours, and sacrifices will be necessary.

On a larger level, we help loved ones by becoming a part of the eating disorder community and working with organizations that support mental health and are committed to increasing high-quality treatment options for everyone.

Wherever you are and whatever you're doing, if you have a loved one with an eating disorder, remember you are their greatest advocate and may be the most important person in their life. Never underestimate your strength and power to help your loved one get the help they need.
Mark Warren, MD

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